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Janitor On Duty

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March 28th, 2009

1:04 PM

My favorite post ever on the Scary Boards

The Scary Boards are what sane people call the official American Idol forums. Do not go there if you haven't been there before, because right now they have "(Male Contestant) After Dark" threads there where you basically have adult women and young girls writing awful erotic fantasies involving various combinations of Anoop/Kris/Matt/Adam buggery (let's just say that these little girls love the idea of Adam turning Anoop, Kris, and/or Matt into TEH GHEY) or FanGirl+Male Contestant bad sex stories.

But this has to be my absolutely favorite "Church-going Bible-thumping Granny gone wild" post:

oh my god..my whole reproductive system just disintegrated tonight. goodness gracious, holy mother mary, benevolent joseph and the whole army of cherubins and angels..please let there be a naked theme in this show. please, please, please...only 4 inches of clothing allowed or maybe stripping would be a prerogative. and the starting lyrics should be an impetus for more stripping..ok, did i use those words right? i'm trying to adapt words from anoop's dictionary, in my everyday conversation. help.

seriously, anoop looks so goddamn hot tonight, his stylist must not have survived dressing him up. i know i wouldn't. hmm..maybe anoop wouldn't. if i was his stylist, i doubt it if he'll still be able to make it and sing in the show, all in one piece.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, ME WANT TO EAT HIM UP!!!! ME HUNGRY FOR ANOOP!!!! ME ALREADY HAVE ANOOP ULCER!!!!

3 comment(s).

Posted by K. Z. Snow:

Is this the right place? The Confessional? Okay, here goes.

Father Giggles, I, too, have had unclean thoughts about Adam turning Kris (yeah, only Kris) into TEH GHEY. 'Cause, let me tell you, any cute 23-year-old man who's been coerced into marrying some insecure bimbo deserves to find overflowing buckets of sweaty-hot happiness with the prettiest creature on the show ... and I don't mean "Tweetles." :P
March 28th, 2009 @ 1:29 PM

Posted by Conrad:

Oooh! Does this mean that girls are openly admitting their desires for some hot gay, guy-on-guy action? I mean American Idol is pretty big. Loads of people watch it and go to their website. Could it be that all girls secret, dark fantasy are finally revealed? I hope so. Asian girls are already huge fans of gays and they openly admit it just like a guy admitting he loves lesbians. This part of a girls fantasy are avoided like the plague in American media. But I know that yaoi is becoming fast popular. Just wish the media would make some mention of it. Gay guys are hot! Anyways, I'm off to check out some of those gay loves meself! ;)
March 28th, 2009 @ 5:37 PM

Posted by Mrs G:

Conrad, is it too late to stop you from doing that? The bad grammar and horrific fanfic quality of those posts are NOT pleasant.

But yes, they are admitting their love for some manlove. This surprises me as well as you!
March 28th, 2009 @ 6:50 PM