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May 23rd, 2014

12:53 PM

Another American Idol season down the drain

Click the thumbnail to see a larger version... if you dare

There are some general truths when it comes to American Idol.

One, the people that vote on this show are predominantly white women in their 50s and 60s, from the Southern area.

Two, they love guys. White guys. And, for some reasons only they would understand, guys that would be considered physically unappealing ("Hell, no!" if you want to be blunt) outside of this show. See: Clay Aiken, Lee DeWyze, Blake Lewis, David Cook, and any random guy in this season's Top 10.

So, is it any surprise that, once they let loose some white guys singing MOR old crock on this show, someone like Caleb Johnson snakes to the top? He looks like that Chuckie doll after overdosing on carbohydrates. He sounds like any random half-drunk karaoke singer in a bar.

And his winning single is currently hovering in the low 100s of iTunes. The previous winner, Candice Glover, at least got a Top 10 iTunes single before she flopped worse than Godzilla losing its breath after a marathon. This fellow is going to flop even worse than that. But at least the vote-happy white women of the South are happy, I guess...l

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